Surveillance flunkie

You knew it was only a matter of time before the internet junkie got herself a blog. In my mind, I'd always imagined it would be a sewing blog, life with 3 kids blog, photography blog (or whatever hobby of the month I'm obsessed with)...not a cancer blog. Cancer blog it is, though. Maybe I'll throw in some sewing and pictures of kids when things get low, but it seems like a blog will be a great way to keep those we love in the loop about Reese's progress.

The basic plan is that Reese will start BEP (bleomycin, etoposide, cisplatin) therapy on Monday. After a whirlwind 2 months hammering out CKE's annual financial reports at work, he got a call from his oncologist saying he wanted to see Reese one week earlier than they'd originally scheduled to discuss his CAT scan results. It is never a good thing when your oncologist says he wants you to come in right away. Apparently, a few pesky cancer cells got loose before the surgeon got the original tumor out and now those cells have settled in some lymph nodes near his vena cava and aorta. We flunked surveillance. Or maybe we nailed surveillance -- if that's what the plan was. We were to keep watching and waiting to see if any cancer cells show up, and that's exactly what happened.

Reese is cramming to get everything taken care of before his 9 weeks of hibernation begin. Unpacking boxes for a move to a new office, PET scan and pulmonary function test, stocking up on books and movies, kicking a caffeine addiction, fixing car brakes...there are better and worse times to start chemotherapy, but there's never a good time. Right now, the boys think it's cool that Dad's going to go bald. Dad doesn't feel the same way about that.

We're going to enjoy the rest of the week, take in some flag football games, stuff Reese with all of his favorite foods, take naps, celebrate Ellery's birthday, and try not to Google too much.

The day after we found out that Reese was going to have to go through chemotherapy, God gave me the most timely encouragement at our Thursday morning Bible study. We've been working through the fruit of the spirit (Beth Moore's Living Beyond Yourself) and were just finishing up 3 weeks on faith (okay God, okay!). We started with a passage from Isaiah, a promise from God for those who trust him: "Do not be afraid, for I have ransomed you. I have called you by name, you are mine. When you go through deep waters and great trouble, I will be with you. When you go through rivers of difficulty, you will not drown! When you walk through the fire of oppression, you will not be burned up; the flames will not consume you. For I am the Lord, your God, the Holy One of Israel, your Savior." (Isaiah 43:1-3)

Not only do I have the reassurance that the hand of God will be holding my head above water, but there's blessing waiting on the other side of the trial. Maybe it's a renewed understanding of God's grace, a deeper connection with those we love, compassion and courage developing in my children, someone who trusts Christ as their Savior? I don't know what it will be, but it's going to be good. When I feel like I'm getting swallowed up by the waves, I need to trust in the One who ransomed me and remember the shore is not too far off. The crossing itself is going to be miserable, but the other side is going to be good.